I had three babies in hospitals before having a home birth with my fourth. It was definitely a trial and error process finding my ideal experience. I knew from my previous experiences that the hospital, even with a certified nurse midwife wasn’t going to be able to give me the spiritual experience I was determined to have when bringing my child into the world. I always left the hospital feeling like my power and choices had completely been taken away from me. I was always really depressed by what had happened “to me.” Like instead of being able to give birth, my baby was taken out of me by someone else.

I started my fourth pregnancy with an OBGYN and planning another hospital birth when I met someone that had had a home birth. I was surprised that she was so “normal!” (Do normal people have home births? I thought it was just the crazy extremists!) She gave me the name of her midwife and a short list of some other women that had had home births. I called every one and talked to them about their experiences and found out they were people just like me that just wanted the births of their children to be a spiritual experience where they were allowed to move and be in whatever place they were most comfortable and would be supported and encouraged without the use of drugs.

I asked my husband to go with me to interview some homebirth midwives, to which he said, “NO!” I finally got him to go with the promise that I wasn’t going to do it, but just wanted to get educated. We drove home from the appointment having decided we were going to have a homebirth! The selling point for my husband was that the midwife said she didn’t believe in taking risks and would get us to the hospital at any sign of trouble. We live 3-5 minutes away from the hospital, so we felt safe that if there was any reason to get there, we could.

I AT LAST had the peaceful feeling that I was going be in control of my daughter’s birth. It was so exciting to prepare for it! I watched every “Baby Story” where the mother had a homebirth or a natural childbirth at a birthing center, hoping to learn a few relaxation tips. I also listened to Hypnobirthing CDs. I’m convinced both of those things helped give me confidence that I could do it and not to have any fear of the pain I was going to feel.

I was 11 days post due date when I decided I wanted to get my OBs opinion on the health of my baby. I spent a couple hours in the hospital getting stress tests and saw my OB. She said that, “At this point you’re just waiting for something bad to happen. You should just start the pitocin and have your baby now.” I felt worried even though she admitted the baby looked fine. I was really close to just doing as she suggested, but my husband convinced me to visit our midwife first (Every woman that’s 11 days overdue needs a voice of reason nearby!).

I went into labor at home that night, in bed at 1:20 am on my own. My husband started the tub while I concentrated on my breathing. He called our midwife and she was at a birth an hour away. My contractions were getting closer together with each one so we knew it was going to happen fast. We called Janae, our midwife’s partner, and she assured us she’d be there asap. In the meantime I kept telling myself the contractions were just the baby and that it was life-giving pain. It worked! I wasn’t at all afraid and I knew that as the contractions got harder, it just meant my baby was getting closer. I was still in the tub when Janae arrived in time to listen to the baby’s heart once and catch the baby after one small push, one hour after I felt the first contraction.

The experience was quiet, peaceful and spiritual; just like I had always imagined giving birth should be. Nobody told me what I needed to do. I just listened to my body and my husband held my hand, totally confident in my inherent ability to give birth.

Giving birth to my daughter will always be the crowning moment of my life. The thing I am most proud of! I’m so grateful for Janae and all midwives that are willing to help women like me to have the greatest experiences of their lives.

Shannon Jensen